Entry 2
My Two Bytes ... On Reality TV (an article from the company newsletter)
Recently, my life took a turn for the worse. Most nights on my way home from school I find myself feeling a sense of pride in my ability to deal with the reality of life. Such was the night it all went black.
I walked in the door. Seated on the couch were my wife and her sister, committing the most grievous sins to ever plague the Earth. Take a deep breath and read on ... if you dare: They were watching The Bachelor, one of the many malevolent reality TV shows that plague our homes. As I sat down, the serpent beguiled me and I partook, I mean watched. Even worse, in the days to follow, I found myself deep in thought about the lives of the participants and discussing it at length with my wife.
What kinda ...? This so-called "reality" TV has found it’s way into my home in increasing strength ever since that fateful evening. After The Bachelor, it was Big Brother 4. Seemingly without choice, I find myself being sucked into the shear evil that is reality TV.
More recently, the devil has manifested himself in my home as a show known as Survivor. For those so lucky to have avoided any contact with this spawn of Satan, I will explain the premise: A group of people signs up to win a million dollars. Only one will win. The participants are placed in a remote location with only the clothes on their backs. They are grouped into teams (known as tribes) and work together to make shelter, obtain food, and, unbeknownst to them, create a pecking order in which someone inevitably takes a leadership position and starts bossing the others around. Somehow, watching a couple of bossy men come nigh to blows for the position of alpha-male makes Survivor more alluring than Friends.
Each day, the tribes are presented with challenges. Some are physical, others mental, and still others a combination of both. The tribe that wins the challenge, will win certain privileges. For example, they might win a steak and lobster dinner or a shower. Things that are taken for granted in the real reality. Allegiances and brotherhoods are formed against the most disliked person in the tribe. Each night a tribal counsel is held and it’s curtains for the most disliked person. Tribal counsel is your opportunity to vote the guy you were fighting with out of your tribe. Eventually, everyone is voted out and one person walks away a millionaire, or in simpler terms, the true alpha male or female.
I know, know ... ‘Dan, how could you let yourself go down this path of wickedness?’ Truth be known, I hate the fact that I’ve been so sucked into this trash. If I had a personalized license plate it would say IH8SRVR. And what’s so real about it anyway? Ponder the following list of facts:
- We can’t go fishing all day in the name of survival.
- Information Systems will never win a free steak and lobster dinner for besting Human Resources at tug-o-war (although that would be cool!).
- We can’t vote our boss out of the company for our chance at the money.
- There will never be any kind of company function where there is any question that food might not be available.
- None of us will ever be as attractive as Rupert (pictured here):
I hope I’ve steered as many of you toward the harsh reality of reality TV as humanly possible. Please, for your family’s sake, tune into the reality of real life.